UNBELIEVABLE BUT TRUE!

Hey, guys! Become a luxury cruise ship captain and see the world! Apparently it doesn’t take an education or much training. If you can row a boat, you’re in!

From what I have gathered from the news, the captain of the Costa Concordia veered off course as a favor so the head waiter could salute his family on shore and ran the ship aground. Hey moron, the head waiter wanted to wave from the ship’s deck, NOT on the shore! Seems this led to one huge clusterfuck resulting in lost lives, missing passengers and a possible environmental episode.

What a poor excuse for a cruise ship to begin with. When we cruised, the port authority would not let us leave port without participating in a disaster drill first and foremost!

Secondly, there is no way in hell a captain would be stupid enough to veer off course unless getting permission to avoid a hurricane, not to grant a favor to the help! And doesn’t it make you wonder what the head waiter did to earn this favor? (elevate your mind, Goat).

So, if this is all it takes, I want to be a cruise ship captain and sit at the big table in the main dining room! After all, I can drive a car, row a boat and paddle a canoe which should qualify me nicely!