Friday, December 20, 2013

MIXED EMOTIONS


Ever have one of those periods of time when you don’t know whether to laugh or cry?  Not fun, I know!
I had an appointment to see my doctor this morning for my usual blood pressure check and to see if my heart was still beating.  BP was good; ticker still ticking.  But this appointment was totally different from the ones I’ve had with her over the last 27 years; it was to be my last.
The foxy lady turned 65 years old while my back was turned and she is retiring from practice the first of March, 2014!  I am so happy for her!  She wants to travel and see all the things she has missed.  Yea, laugh, laugh!
But wait a minute!  That leaves me without my trusted pal and physician!  She can’t leave!  Boo, sob, sob!
But not to worry!  She has set me up with a brand new physician (looks like a teenager) who has her office with another female physician in the professional building at my favorite hospital on the west side and only a five minute drive from my home!   Yea, laugh, laugh!
Dr. “T” and I said our good-byes since my next appointment is not due to be scheduled until April, 2014 and she will be “on the road” by then.  We thanked and wished each other the best with a huge, “I don’t want to let you go” hug.
Crap, I hate mixed emotions!

Monday, August 5, 2013

MYSTERY CONTINUED

 
 
A photo of the t-shirt's left front shoulder mentioned below.  Strange!

ANOTHER UNSOLVED MYSTERY


No, this is not the recap of another dream of mine.  This was actually discovered this morning as I readied for my day.
I have (had) a favorite t-shirt that I liked to wear because it was large and comfy.  It happened to be one of the t-shirts featured and sold by the Marching Black and Gold for the year 2010.  I had worn it yesterday and had slung it over the arm of the stuffed chair in my bedroom last night before bed since it was clean enough to wear today.
When I got dressed this morning and while standing in front of my vanity mirror, I noticed something wrong with the left shoulder of my 2010 t-shirt.  Upon closer inspection, I saw a four inch patch of material that appeared to have been chewed, was once wet and now dry, with about five either claw or tooth holes in the middle of the whole mess.
You know how a cat will suckle on a blanket and knead it with its front paws?  That’s how it looked.  Only one problem; I don’t have a cat and my dog Peaches is far beyond the chewing stage that all puppies go through.  She will be nine years old in December and she had slept by my side almost the whole night until Richard came home from the movies and shut my door.
Anyway, now my favorite t-shirt is ruined and I have a mystery on my hands.  Just how in the world did it get ruined in the short period between my going to bed for the evening and this morning when I got up and dressed?
We do not have rodents in the building, nor moths or anything else living that could have made the holes and crusty looking patch on my shirt.  We do, however, have a spirit or two, one of which could be my long-deceased cat, Sasha.
If I ever figure out the answer to this mystery, I’ll certainly pass it on to you.  Meanwhile, I’ll ponder and wonder!

Monday, July 8, 2013

BAAA!!


Long time, no see!  Yep, I’m still vertical, just as silly and totally out of my friggin’ mind!
As stated in earlier posts, I have controlled high blood pressure, low thyroid and suffer from anxiety and depression.  I take prescribed medications to treat all of the above.  Some of these meds cause me to have very strange dreams; for example:
I am in the living room of someone's home and there with me is a very strange acting toddler.  He has on bright blue footie jammies and seems to run, not walk to wherever he thinks he needs to be.  He has the nasty habit of hiding behind things and jumping out at people with his eyes bugging, showing an open mouth full of pointed, baby shark teeth and screaming BAAA!  He then tries to bite his intended victim and when unsuccessful, runs to hide and repeats the whole process over again.
Somewhere in the mayhem of trying to dodge these razor sharp teeth, my sister-in-law enters the room with an album of photos she insists on sharing while warding off the little monster whom she calls "Charlie".  This goes on for some time while intent on these photos I just "have to see":  BAAA!  Back off Charlie!  BAAA!  BAD Charlie!  BAAA!  CHARLIE!  BAAA!”
I dream almost nightly and these dreams are as varied as they are strange.  Is it any wonder that I wake up tired, sleep deprived and cranky?
I need a long, South Seas vacation sans meds!  BAAA!

Sunday, May 5, 2013

SCHIZOID BYSTANDER


About 14 years ago, I opened up to my doctor about some of the feelings I had been having for years; anxiety, depression, anger, etc.  Why it took me so long to talk about these symptoms, only God knows for sure.
Anyway, she made the suggestion that I start taking Paxil to see if this could alleviate my "stress" and I agreed.  I think at this point I would have agreed to just about anything short of taking up drinking again.
My first week on the drug I felt like a new person!  I was happy, relaxed and had an interest in living.  Then on the eighth day, I woke up feeling odd.  As the day progressed, so did my anger and other feelings of wanting to destroy something.  If I had possessed a firearm and someone had walked up to me and looked cross-eyed at me, they would have been dead.  Simple as that!  I immediately called the doctor and was told to stop taking the Paxil that minute.  I did.
We scheduled another office visit and I was put on Lexapro.  After taking this drug for a period of time (samples furnished by my doctor), I was switched to Citalopram (generic for Celexa) because my insurance would not cover Lexapro and the doctor's samples were depleted.
I took the Citalopram until about two weeks ago.  During all that time which was a matter of quite a few years, I was doing fine, or so I thought.  It finally hit me that I had started losing the desire to do just about everything.  My attitude was getting worse by the day and I felt the old anger creeping up on me again.  Although I would never take my own life, thoughts of my own demise were front and foremost in my mind. I knew old age was not the culprit.  So, during my next visit to the doctor about two weeks ago, we discussed it all once again.
I had heard that during the past couple of years, they had developed a generic for Lexapro called, of all things, Escitalopram.  I asked to be put back on the old reliable Lexapro generic (proven to work during the "sample" period).  Also, my insurance company would cover the generic Escitalopram.  Hallelujah!  This stuff ain’t cheap!
After starting the medication in small doses two weeks ago, I immediately started to feel better.  I only have short periods of melancholy and the anger has all but subsided.  I still supplement with my anti-anxiety med which my doctor agreed I still needed.  I’ll be starting the recommended full dosage Monday.
Mental illness is a conscious, feeling, real wide-awake nightmare and should be taken seriously, addressed and treated.
Now, maybe I'll feel like taking an active part in my own life and will no longer be the schizoid bystander!

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

A DREAM CAME TRUE


A dream has come true for my daughter, Erin.  She will be graduating from Indiana University School of Education with "Highest Distinction" (summa cum laude) in May.

She has accomplished this remarkable feat even though she is a wife, mother of two teenagers and has attended college mostly on a part-time basis.

For this last semester, she is teaching high school English full time in the southern portion of Marion County.  She reports that it is exhausting but well worth the hard work.  In other words, she loves it!

I will have to credit her unique intelligence and fine work ethic to her Papaw, my father.  It is her legacy from him.  I only wish that he and my mother could be here in person to see her graduate but know they will be with her in spirit.

My children continue to be my blessing.  I am one very proud mom!

Friday, February 22, 2013

HARD TO BELIEVE


I can't believe it's been a month since my last post! Time flies when you're having fun! Or not.

Sonnyboy spent last week on vacation, went back to work Tuesday night and came down with a stomach virus Wednesday and spent the last two nights at home sick. I also had something similar at the same time but not as violent. Thank goodness we both have had our flu shots.

I did have one major complaint within the last month that I almost devoted an entire post to but decided I was making myself sick just thinking and stewing about it so I'll devote just two sentences to it: (1) Have I missed something in the fashion news whereas women now wear a new type of bra that lifts the boobs into the neck region and the latest haute couture is also for these same women to wear nothing from the nipples up? (2) As far as I'm concerned, this borders on indecent exposure and is in the same category as bare-breasted feeding of a two-year-old while shopping in the grocery section of Walmart! (Okay, 3) Disgusting!

Now that I have that out of the way, this weather has been driving me crazy as well (although it doesn't have far to drive). We had about a quarter of an inch of ice fall overnight and now it is melting. I will certainly be glad when Spring arrives (then we can look forward to tornadoes). Ah hates Winter!

I think this just about covers it for a while. I suppose not too much has gone on ergo no posting for a month!

Take care!